Wedding bells over Lake Lugano

Oh February. The month of Carnevale, relatively cold weather (Lugano's weather is very similar to Eugene's at this time of year, though we've had a few unseasonably warm days), and midterms (even here, on semesters, I am taking midterms now). And it's also the month that contains that celebration of romance and candy hearts known as Valentine's Day. As much as the holiday can be horribly cheesy and sometimes depressing (Singles' Awareness Day, anyone?), it also provides a convenient opportunity to affirm relationships and, as I've discovered over the last few days, to get engaged. I guess it's the season of love. The engagement announcements just seem to keep coming. I'm genuinely happy for my friends who have found that special person with whom they want to spend the rest of their lives. But it also reminds me how quickly we are growing up and just how far away I am myself from making the decision to marry.

So, for those of you who haven't yet heard, my friend Rachel, one of my closest friends from middle and high school, agreed to marry her boyfriend of about a year and a half, Ryan, on Valentine's Day. And as much as I could never apply the situation to myself, I can't help but be happy. Yes, sometimes it has felt like my beloved friend had suddenly gained about 10 years in 6 months when she tells me about going to Tupperware parties and buying houses, but I do not, and cannot, feel like this is a bad, hasty decision. They have taken their time to get to know each other and each other's families. They are clearly not just infatuated with each other. I've never felt uncomfortable around them. They don't feel the need to prove their love to everyone they meet, and for this I believe that they actually do have the maturity and mentality required to make the decision to marry. I also have to commend how much they have involved their families in this important decision. They are even waiting for Ryan's parents to return home from a vacation before setting the date. They are taking their time, being rational, and reaching out to their families and friends, and for this I am thankful. I also have to say that Ryan is a good guy. He has always been nice to me and as far as I can tell treats Rachel as well as any friend could hope for.

So, congratulations! I can't really think of a better way to celebrate finishing my Fall 2007 finals that to fly back to Eugene to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. Rae, I just ask, please pick flattering bridesmaid dresses. I have faith that you won't try to dress me in pink tulle or anything.

Also, this lovely Carnevale weekend, I learned that two of our UCSD IV staff members got engaged to each other (I didn't even know they were dating) at large group on Valentine's Day. And the pictures are adorable. Also, perhaps the biggest shock, came right before I left Eugene to come to Lugano, when I learned via Facebook that another friend of mine at UCSD got engaged to a guy I still haven't met (They started dating just before the beginning of last quarter, I think). They're getting married in June, and as much as they are going through this whole process much faster than I ever would, it's nice to see her so happy. And I can't complain about anything that makes a friend of mine happier than I have ever seen her before. I had better meet this guy when I go to San Diego for my 21st birthday at the end of May.

But most of all, watching my friends get engaged has made me realize that we are all truly entering into adulthood. On Saturday night, I watched The Lion King with a few of my neighbors in the building here, and I couldn't help but sympathize with Timon and Pumbaa when they fear that they will lose their friend Simba if he marries Nala. As I sit here in Switzerland, nowhere near ready for marriage and still trying to figure out what I want to do with my life, I find myself fighting similar feelings, fearing that my friends' partners will steal them from me, so to say. But I assure myself that I have nothing to fear, that this is the best thing for them at this moment in time.

So I stand here, on a sunny afternoon, overlooking the beautiful Lake Lugano, admiring the splendor that is a part of life. I know that this adventure in Switzerland is where I'm supposed to be now, living the life I have set out for me, figuring out just who I want to become. I walk along the lake to the grocery store downtown, watching the swans that groom themselves beside the lake, and realize that I am in a pretty cool place right now. But Rachel is in an equally good place, even if it is a very different one. And I feel hopeful that having friends experiencing different facets of life right now will prove to be enriching, sort of like how the Alps and the Mediterranean combine to create the harmony that surrounds this lake in this town that is my temporary home.